yeah.. just only..that why i found it werid when he din responded to my msg.. he’s upset.. who wouldn’t be.. and i am too.. and i just wan to help him.. but it looks like there’s nothing i can do cos he already has his own solution and i cant be of any help.

i just wanted to help.. just wanted to be there.. just wanted to be useful.. just wanted to do something..

but there’s nothing to be done.. it seems..

i’m started re-playing maple.. since fri onwards.. ever since i saw tt ad in today paper.. and tt lucky draw boy said tt he played too.. and darling said tt his fingers itchy.. and jem said tt he;s getting married so i should come online.. bought new clothes and revived my pet.. and yup.. guess the old maple days would be back soon.. everyone is so high level now.. extremely jealous.. all having 3rd job le! i will catch up with them!

mother’s cross with me too.. cos i din go home last night.. not that i did it on purpose.. cos after work i was tired.. then we were playing maple till pretty late.. then i kinda fell asleep.. we did set the alarm for 4am.. to wake up and go home.. but i was too tired.. then i said to let me sleep for half hour more.. then darling forgot to reset the alarm.. and so……….

yeahh… it’s my fault la.. shouldnt have gone back to sleep.. =( then we were now saying tt when we meet, dun sleep, least we fall asleep again.. then wait mummy becomes cross with me again..

but we said tt before he lost his phone.. so i dunno now.. =(

all the unhappines just after we had such a nice evening together yesterday.. =(

yesterday we finally had dinner at aji-tei.. food’s not bad.. desert so-so only.. then i bought dar a new pen engraved with his name oh! oh well… hope he will use it to sign his deals ba! =)

my link points

guess wat.. we argued again. kinda. over nothing really.. and everything started all over again.. me unhappy, he angry, we both wanted to end things. then after a while its gets ok.

but it leaves us tired.

how?

honestly, i really like him.. he’s nice.. very sweet, fun to be with.. its just sometimes, when i feel upset out of the blue, which pple do sometimes, he get angry. it seems abit weird to me that he gets angry with me when i’m upset. should it be tt he gets upset when i’m upset? sighh…

he said tt he dun like me to take my temper out on him when i’m unhappy.. but i didn’t.. i just sat there.. he came to talk to me and when i couldnt tell why i wasnt happy, he got angry. with me. sighhh.. every 2/3 days argue is cos of like this.. then how?

i don’t know.

you think i wan to be unhappy meh… just that i got alot of things to think about.. things to consider.. and thing is tt.. when pple are upset, he don’t come confort.. maybe to him it is conforting.. its his normal reaction.. wat he doesnt know tt it kinda omes to me as harsh.. i’m already upset and there he was raising his voice, having an irritated face.. and saying thnigs like crying wont solve the problem.

but crying is a relief rite? if not why do people cry when they are sad?

i wasnt like this last time… much much happier i guess.. i dunno why.. maybe cos its been such a long time.. and the honeymoon period is over.. but then again, there is something there in this r/s that makes me want to hold on to it.

like i know that he is the one that is meant to be. like he is the one that i am to speand forever with. like he is the one i wan to do things for everyday. like he is the one that i really love.

but then again.. what is the point when its not mutual. maybe i’m just sensitive.. which he think so too.. but what am i supposed to think when he keeps saying things so harsh that it hurts so much.. and he means the thnigs that he says..

aren’t people supposed to accept their loved ones for who they are, be giving and acceptive and work together to make things better?

i’m trying.. his work, is not very smooth.. i’m trying to be supportive.. he dun sees it as that way.. thinks tt i’m doing it like only.. once, helping him to call.. once helping his find the ad..

and i’m feeling upset again. and i dunno why.. xiang zhe xiang zhe.. jiu bu kai xing.. i wan to tell him things… but everytime i wan to tell him, he just cuts me and say a whole lot of things.. not listen to me.. say i’m unreasonable.. and i dun really get to show him my point.. then when i wan to show, he says i cut him in.. and when i’m upset, he will just ask and ask and ask and i will just forget about the whole thing and we argue again. again and again.

i dont like this feeling. he said i made him like tt. said he wasnt like tt before.. can you really feel yourself changing and pin point the reason why? he don’t see his own faults.. he thinks he has none actually.. so i tell him.. then he said that he’s only human. so why can’t he feel angry?

its like we cant communicate with each other anymore. sighhhhhhh..

then i wonder how well we understand each other.. everyone has kinda envied me. said tt we are very loving.. i wish things are like tt.. or rather, were the way it were before. we were… very very loving, once upon a time.. whenever he meets me, i’m alwasys uper super happy… in fact, i am still, when i see him… but i guess, we both have problems of our own.. to think about..

i’ll make this work.. i’ll make things better for both of us.. its not easy to find someone that can makes u feel all the things he made me feel.. even the hurt, and pain, guess its cos he’s someone so important that even the slightest hurtful thing cuts so deep in..

if only he knew..

starhub sux!

my very nice "the riddle" tone was replace by some weird song tt i have never heard before… and of cos i called starhub to bitch..

and the girl on the line with me now is super blur!!!!!!! i dun care they better solve the problem for me considering i spent like $4.10 for it… they should like waive the charges off for me or something man!

and after typing so much, tt girl is still holding me! wierd thing is she din even like verify details with me.. and i believe she has never even heard of five for fighting before listening to her blur voice… sighhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh..

and i’m still being hold.

@##$@%&#@!&

then again, i’m in cust svc myself too..so cant blame them for taking time to do things ya..

alright.. put down the phone le.. actually its my own fault.. hehehehe… i forgot to change the asigned call tone.. hehehehehhehhehhee…

now call me! then can listen to a very very nice song… hehehee

starhub does not sux after all.. hehehee

*paiseh smile*

today is the start of the tcs additional 10% off.. super lucky i’m at atrium.. haha dun have to see all those mad pple.. but atrium also very busy with all the calls.. was kinda disappointed cos darling did not call me when he woke up.. think its on purpose ba.. then mel kinda asked me to come back tml to work then she re-scheduled my off day to much much later.. sigh…

so i called darling, and that’s when i realised that he has already woken up, bathed, left house and went to office to do work. all without telling me. how hurtful is that? sigh.. i kinda overhead that he has a viewing for the flat tml so i called to make sure that the viewing is still on… and since its at 3pm.. i realise might as well just go to work.. cos i’ll be meeting jem and bee at close to 7 too for dinner.. then we most prob be able to spend a few hours tog.. kinda not worth the trouble of travelling up and down..

so yeah.. i decided to work.. and my next off day will be on wed. wow.. it sux..

there’s a new set of lucky draw boys, but they are super young.. 16.. and kinda dao.. haha.. think they shy ba.. when they bore their brains out at atrium then they will come talking to me.. haha which as i predict, would be sooner or later. hahaha!! sadly, they will be there till like christmas.. sigh..

saw jing xiong and clarance today.. sweeties came to accompany me at atrium for a few hours.. chatting and laughing and making the time past faster.. thanks guys.. jessica came too.. =) and brought cakes and pies.. so sweet.. so it was a very very nice day at atrium really.. to have so many pple accompanying me that i happily ignored all the calls.. haha!!

they accompany me on my break.. and we went shopping in the store no less.. and we just had to meet dothory at sports dept.. her di pan! and she hit me on the hand.. -.-" wonder if she knows i’m working today.. anyways, i saw nice swimsuits fm speedo.. maybe going to buy ba.. then will go swimming more actively.. i must exercise and lose weight!!! but clarance said tt i lost some weight.. round the face area… soooo happy!

and ohh… something else he told me.. about another one of glenn’s ex-es *rolls eyes* stephanie? she used to be working in taka once upon a time too.. i did saw her quite a number of times in the locker room actually.. and did have my suspicions.. like she’s very familiar… like his ex.. but i din really think so much into it.. its only today when calarance told me that he asked her if she knew me then she told him tt i am her ex’s ex gf. so weird rite… how come clarance will suddenly ask her bout me… hmmmmmmmmmmmm

then he say.. can conclude tt glenn like cute girls.. hmmmm

tired to contact darling fm afternoon till evening about 7.. he din pick up my calls nor reply my msges.. when he finally did, he said tt he did not recied any one of them.. said tt his phone is right beside him but it din ring… cos its on vibrating mode.. he forgot to change back after he went home fm office.. -.-" but then again, nvm la.. not his fault tt his phone din register my calls.. just tt i was super worried what i couldnt contact him.. told me tt he’s going driving range with daddy and mummy to have dinner then practice golf and not going majong… but like an hour later he msged me again to tell me tt he finish dinner and going to play majong… sigh… then said he din see the msg till recently tt’s why the change in plan.. oh well.. as long he’s happy..

then i realise tt the next i will get to meet him will be on sunday after my work.. so long… but.. its something to look forward to ba.. =)

today finish work super late at 11… blahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh… i hate tcs.. tml still working morning shift… urghhhhhhhhhhh and ohhh… its 1.10 le! and i havent do bee’s card for tml…. shucks.. =P

alright… i promised glenn that i would a free advertisement for his mummy’s online flower shop if he gets me a song.. and although, i havent got my song yet, i’ll just post this first..

www.flowers2u.com.sg

the designs there are not bad.. but kinda limited.. webbie also slightly diff to navigate.. but overall, i give 3 stars our of 5.

anyways, anybody planning to give me flowers, can buy from there too.. i like flowers, be it roses, lilies or sunflowers. *hint hint* it’s been a loooooooooong time since i last recieve flowers. and it would be very nice to be know that you are remembered and thought of.

anyways, prices for the flowers are very reasonable, starting from as low as S$30.. but dun think got delivery ba.. but to be able to recieve flowers form the hands of your loved and close ones would be so much nicer right? =)

*hint hint*

amazing hows its like when pple can see the faults of others and advice them but not the faults of their own.

i msged back rachel and told her stuff.. and sincerly hope that things b/w them will turn out for the better. i know you are reading this, and yeah… give things another shot ya.. can feel that she still loves you loads..

it was nice.. since we missed it last yr, we made plans to catch the moon together this yr instead. haha.. but tt day, i happily forgotten my phone, so it was kinda hard to make arrangements but then again, i waas at atrium so i can happily use the phone w/o being disturbed. yesh!

met my beloved after work on friday at tpy. he had his test and just ended not too long ago when i reached tpy. had a very filling dinner. the usual hokkien mee and fried oyster. its all wah’s fault man! ever since tt time she mentioned about fried oyster, i have been eating it like.. always… oily like shit. but its nice.. =P also, darling also likes it.. but i realise he eats mostly the fried flour and not the oyster.. havent acquire the taste yet.. hahaha

then we went home, just nice daddy was going to singa inn for golfing.. then we faster changed and grabbing our bladding stuff and asked daddy to tompang us to east coast..

it was super hazy that day that the sky and sea just blended together.. and we cant even see the lights on the boats at sea. but the good thnig is, it was very breezy.. and another good thing is.. i didn;t fall! at all! hahhahaha.. so happy.. and it was nice seeing the very round and orangie moon and the lighted candles and lanterns along the way..

we kinda bladed for an hour plus.. din really go very very very far and took rests in between cos.. hahaha too lonnnnnng nv exercise ah… then knee kinda suan easily.. but its the left knee tt is suan instead of the right one.. so its abit weird..

but its nice.. and its our first ba yue shi wu together. daddy says its china’s valentine’s day. but i tot its on the fifteen day of the first month of the lunar calander? or is that the valentine’s day of the lunar calander?

*shrugs*

what matters most is tt we had a great time and enjoyed each other’s company.

ookies! i’ve decided to come back blogging… =) to update pple who used to read and for me to come visit memories long after.

lets see.. its too many months back since my last entry to recap, so i guess lets start with recent happenings. glenn’s ex msged me recently.. to ask bout him no less. its like tt with all girls i suppose.. they just cant forgive and forget their partners’ ex. me too.. so if joel’s ex-es are reading this, yeahh.. we did talk, argue and had disagreements and unhappiness over u pple. honestly, i do not like to be involved in pple’s r/s. i mean… it’s essentially between 2 pple.. but thing is, she thinks tt’s a 3rd party is involved, but he say its cos of work then not spending enouff time with her.

which makes me think… hmm.. maybe i should review my r/s as well.. everybody needs their own space in life..

bee’s birthday coming! on the 18 of this month.. everyone who knows her flood her with messages!

i’ve recently upgraded my dvd rental plan.. so will be watching movies pretty often at home now.. of cos home meaning his place as well..

my workplace is under going renovation now and the whole place is freaking dusty and with the haze.. yucks to the max.. but it will be over soon. it will be!!